Unwanted

Whenever I'm with someone or talking to someone I have a fear of being unwanted. I always feel like they're going to get tired of me and leave or just replace me with someone else and in some instances this has proved to be true so maybe that's why I'm scared now. It seems like the further I fall for the person the bigger this fear evolves. I've never gotten to the point in a relationship when I wasn't scared of that anymore. I feel like if I let the other person in all the way and completely trust them that I'm just going to get let down again. I wish I could get over it but I over think everything. It's really bad too if someone even when they're joking keeps putting me down it just makes me feel like they don't want to be around me. I don't think I should feel this way but I do and I wish I knew how to let it go. I feel like I have to work to make someone happy so they won't get annoyed or tired of me. See me and Brad are a lot alike accept he doesn't change for anyone and I do. I'll change and not even realize it. I just like making people happy. I hate to see someone sad even if it's someone I hate after a few minutes of it I'm ready to apoligize, damn I just realized I don't know how to spell apoligize, haha. Anyways and I hate to see someone mad at me. Like after I've argued with someone I'm ready to say I'm sorry and I hate it when I'm the cause of someones sadness. It doesn't matter what they've done to me I still hate to see someone hurt emotionally over something I've done. Now physically on the other hand. If I'm mad at you I kind of get a kick out of it sometimes because I know pain will end eventually. I don't know why I'm still typing. Just my brain running around in circles. And these are a few of my biggest fears ladies and/or gentleman whoever is going to read this lol. Night night, don't let the boogie man into your dreams. Gah, I'm such a weirdo okay I'm done.